The Book Sacrifice Tag

If we are honest with ourselves, we all have those books that everyone else loves but we hate.

So instead of posting a straight rant about all the books I love to hate, I figured I would make it interesting and find a tag best represents my very strong feelings.

The post itself will first list the scenarios, created by Ariel Bissett, and then my answers to them.

So without further explanation, let’s get into these scenarios, shall we?

UnknownAn Over-Hyped book: You’re in a bookstore, just browsing, when BAM! ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE! An announcement comes over the PA system saying that the military has discovered that the zombies’ only weakness is an over-hyped book. What book do you start chucking at the zombies?

The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini.

When this novel came out in 2003, I had no idea that it’s very existence was not going to be known to me until I entered the “hallowed” halls of high school in 2007.

This was the novel my teacher made us read in 10th-grade English, and boy did I hate every minute I had to spend reading this book. Yes, I can see the merit in reading it, and yes, I can also see why people praise it, but to me this book was excruciatingly painful to read.

I remember quite vividly stopping half way through this novel and making the conscious decision to SparkNote the rest of it so that I didn’t have to continue with the repetitive writing and sleep worthy plot-line.

The characters that the readers are meant to like were not likeable. Amir watches Hassan being raped and then decides that following this traumatic event, it’s best to kick this kid (metaphorically) while he is down by denouncing their friendship and throwing pomegranates at him (because pomegranates are the best kick a person while their down fruit of choice).

All in all, I will never pick this book up again, nor will I praise it to fit into the crowd. If I wanted, the Goodreads review fo this novel would go something like this…

Overall Rating:  1 out of 5 stars. 

Unknown-1A Sequel: You’ve just left the hair salon with an amazing new haircut when suddenly it starts to torrential downpour. What sequel do you willingly use as an umbrella?

Go Set a Watchmen by Harper Lee.

Tears, uncontrollable sobbing, and several strongly worded internal monologues later, my childhood was ruined with one “stroke of a pen.”

Why, oh why did someone think it was a good idea to one, publish this book, and two, advertise this as a sequel to To Kill a Mockingbird.

If you’re unaware, I consider To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee to be one of my favourite novels OF ALL TIME. The writing was beautiful, the characters fleshed out (almost real), and the plot, though heavy hitting at times, to be a literary masterpiece. AND THEN SOME PUBLISHER, WHO ONLY WANTED TO MAKE PROFIT, DECIDED TO RUIN THE LEGACY OF HARPER LEE’S ONLY NOVEL WITH THIS SORRY EXCUSE FOR A “SEQUEL.”

Sorry, sorry. This novel is not a sequel, but an admitted earlier draught of the aforementioned To Kill a Mockingbird.

There are very good reasons as to why this book was sent back to Harper Lee and rewritten.

Atticus Finch, the patriarch of the novel, was a racist in the draught, and Lee reworked him into the moral compass we’ve come to love.

When you’re reading Go Set a Watchmen, there are verbatim paragraphs that you can find in the completed To Kill a Mockingbird. 

I wanted this book to be as good as the first, I really did, but all I got out of reading this novel was the mental image of some publishing bigwig with a villainous moustache, diving into a swimming pool full of money.

Overall Rating: 2 out of 5 stars.

filepicker-f8AucPpSdqs55guHhTbu_Wuthering_HeightsA Classic: You’re sitting in a lecture and your English professor is going on and on about how this classic changed the face of literature and you get so sick of it that you chuck the classic clear across the room? Which classic did you chuck?

Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë.

I have a confession to make. I, Sara, used to like Twilight by Stephanie Meyer. There, I said it.

Being too easily swayed by the prospect of sparkly vampires, I remember picking up Wuthering Heights solely based on the fact that Bella Swan name drops it in Twilight. 

Flash forward several years to 2015, where I have come to my senses and realised just how bad both  Twilight and Wuthering Heights are.

As with Twilight, the main male character, Heathcliff, is abusive, however so is Catherine so there’s that. When people argue the merit of this novel it almost always revolves around how their love is the redeeming quality of the story.

But when I hate the characters, and would rather see them alone, I’m sorry, there is no redeeming quality.

Also, Brontë’s choice of having the maid be the narrator, Nelly Dean, telling the story of Catherine and Heathcliff 20 years after the events happen, really doesn’t help the book at all. In fact, Dean’s long-windedness made the book that much more insufferable.

Overall Rating: 2 out of 5 stars. 

2002 Yann Martel Life of PiLeast Favourite Book: You’re hanging in a library when all of a sudden global warming explodes and the world outside becomes a frozen wasteland. You’re trapped and the only chance for survival is to burn a book. What is the first book you run to?

Life of Pie by Yann Martel.

There are no words to express how strong my disdain is for this novel.

Actually, there are, but among them include several expletives, and considering one of the requirements for this blog is to remain as clean as possible, I will not mention them here (Hi Danny and Janet).

I read this novel in 11th-grade English, and because that teacher was slightly crazy, we read the majority of it in the middle of the classroom, in an imaginary boat taped out on the floor, while the teacher squirted us with water out of a McDonald’s toy shaped like a tiger.

Traumatic experience aside, this novel was BORING. It read like a dissertation, not that all dissertations are boring (I’m talking to you Uncle John), but the fact that the end of the novel tells you to decide what was real and what was fake was not what I signed up for.

To be honest, I think the novel would have been much more enjoyable if the tiger Richard Parker ate Pi Patel and the novel ended mid “philosophical” senten….. (see what I did there?)

Overall Rating: 1 out of 5 stars. 

Any who, those are my picks for the book sacrifice tag.

As always, I’ve linked the Amazon pages to the respective book titles, if you feel so inclined to buy these books (you already know what my recommendation would be.)

This was a lot of fun to write, so expect more of them from me moving forward.

*The Book Sacrifice Tag was created by Ariel Bissett on Youtube, if you want to check out the original tag, please click here. All of the pictures featured were found on Google as I only own Go Set a Watchman and Wuthering Heights, but neither of them deserves quality picture taking time.*

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